We call that person who has lost his father, an orphan; and a widower that man who has lost his wife. But that man who has known the immense unhappiness of losing a friend, by what name do we call him? Here every language is silent and holds its peace in impotence.

Four score and seven years ago our fathers brought forth on this continent, a new nation, conceived in Liberty, and dedicated to the proposition that all men are created equal.

You need only reflect that one of the best ways to get yourself a reputation as a dangerous citizen these days is to go about repeating the very phrases which our founding fathers used in the struggle for independence.

It is to be remarked that a good many people are born curiously unfitted for the fate waiting them on this earth.

When you go into court you are putting your fate into the hands of twelve people who weren't smart enough to get out of jury duty.

If the grandfather of the grandfather of Jesus had known what was hidden within him, he would have stood humble and awe-struck before his soul.

Lack of charisma can be fatal.

Freud is the father of psychoanalysis. It had no mother.

American consumers have no problem with carcinogens, but they will not purchase any product, including floor wax, that has fat in it.

A recent police study found that you're much more likely to get shot by a fat cop if you run.

Nothing is so fatal to religion as indifference.

My father always used to say that when you die, if you've got five real friends, then you've had a great life.

If you are young and you drink a great deal it will spoil your health, slow your mind, make you fat - in other words, turn you into an adult.

I bet after seeing us, George Washington would sue us for calling him 'father.'

It was times like these when I thought my father, who hated guns and had never been to any wars, was the bravest man who ever lived.

My father used to play with my brother and me in the yard. Mother would come out and say, 'You're tearing up the grass'; 'We're not raising grass,' Dad would reply. 'We're raising boys.'