Immorality: the morality of those who are having a better time.

The telephone is a good way to talk to people without having to offer them a drink.

One reason why I don't drink is because I wish to know when I am having a good time.

It's Microsoft versus mankind, with Microsoft having only a slight lead.

Reverse every natural instinct and do the opposite of what you are inclined to do, and you will probably come very close to having a perfect golf swing.

He that always gives way to others will end in having no principles of his own.

Love means not ever having to say you're sorry.

Author: A fool who, not content with having bored those who have lived with him, insists on tormenting generations to come.

I've said that playing the blues is like having to be black twice. Stevie Ray Vaughan missed on both counts, but I never noticed.

Illegitimacy is something we should talk about in terms of not having it.

The question about those aromatic advertisements that perfume companies are having stitched into magazines these days is this: under the freedoms guaranteed by the First Amendment, is smelling up the place a constitutionally protected form of expression?

To swear off making mistakes is very easy. All you have to do is swear off having ideas.

When it comes to having a central nervous system, and the ability to feel pain, hunger, and thirst, a rat is a pig is a dog is a boy.

A book reads the better which is our own, and has been so long known to us, that we know the topography of its blots, and dog's ears, and can trace the dirt in it to having read it at tea with buttered muffins.

There must be more to life than having everything.

I shall not die of a cold. I shall die of having lived.